Six Weeks and 40 Degrees

This morning my outdoor thermometer (random gift from my brother that I absolutely cannot live without now) read 37.4. I kid you not. It's November and we are quickly sliding into winter.
I really don't mind at all. Winter means I can accesorize with my hats and scarves. I should have cider on the stove. And we'll get beautiful sunny days where you can still see your breath. Six weeks ago we were in Hawaii.

I find myself reflecting back on this a lot lately. It was an amazing trip that we almost didn't take. Who ever passes up a trip to Hawaii? Who has two thumbs, lives in Portland, and had a busy summer? This girl. And her husband. I wanted to go to Hawaii just because I wanted to go. I felt like I needed to go one last time before I was a mom. I also have United miles that needed to get used. And when I left Hawaii I promised myself I'd return once a year for at least the first five years. Bryan thinks this five year commitment thing is nuts. But, he's the lucky one. Because my promise to myself, and my miles, took us to Hawaii. We hemmed and hawed, and felt like it might be stressful to take yet another trip. So I booked it for just a few days. Four and a half days. We'd stay at a friend's house, go to our favorite places, and enjoy being us without a kid, even if we felt like we didn't need to.

Boy, did we ever need it. Those four and a half days were indulgently relaxing, soothing for our souls, and so easy.

We went to the beach, we ate papayas at "home." We caught up with friends, and floated in the salt water. We ate at our favorite places, and walked along the beach. And we felt connected. To each other, and to the life we left behind. There is no better way to confirm you are not alone in the world than by running into friends at the beach, in the ocean, and as they drive by in their topless Jeep. It's the magic of island living. And it shows that we haven't really left the islands. They live with us.

I'm too lazy to recap all of our Hawaii fun but here are a few pics to paint a picture.

When we got back home to Portland it felt good to be home. We were relaxed and a little tan. We felt connected to each other and confident that Portland is the place for us. For me, it also signaled the beginning of the next chapter. The next 12 weeks before I'd be a mom. An autumn of change and settling in.

I wish I could say it's been as simple as that. Much of October rocked my world in a way that has made me very uncomfortable. I'm not too fond of my coping skills lately, and I'm working to make it all right. I'm trying to tie up October with some twine and set it aside. To let it be that period between easy and the peace and love I will make for myself in November.

If I need a reminder, I'll pour myself a mug of cider and meditate on this Hawaii moment, when everything felt at peace.